Last Thanksgiving was my bestest friends wedding in Florida. As Thanksgiving quickly approaches I am in awe at the mysteries life presents. To think that a year ago we thought that we had beaten all the odds, how naive we are. This Thanksgivng we will have a new addition, Anika Noel. And another life changing event soon after. In just a short year everything for us has changed and change is hard. For those of you in transitition we understand the pain and confusion that life brings, but we know that if we can beat these odds, anything and everything is possible!

To those that follow this and our lives know that I am out of sorts, not myself, weird and it is going to get worse. Please do not let me offend. I wish that I was in control but am not.

Support is needed right now so this is an open invitation to come and hang out. Whenever!

Once again...

Monday morning i awoke to my arm three times it's normal size. The Picc nurse came and evaluated and yep.. i had blown it. So by 1230 I had Ty with a babysitter, thank you steph, and was driving to banner desert. I went to the Preggo triage thinking that since i was preggo that i should start there. Four hours later the one Picc nurse for the whole hospital looks and says that it needs to come out. duh! So they took it and kept some to culture it to see if it is infected as well. By 8 that night the Preggo triage decides that i need to be seen by a internist. So they wheel me down to the Real ER on a Monday at 930. Never do this. Do not go to the ER on a Monday night at 930! I convinced stuart to go home so that he could get some sleep and TY could go to bed in his own bed. Luckily, stuart took my purse as well. IT was one less thing that i had to worry about. There is something to be said for the type of pple in the ER that night. Lets just say that I worked at a Psych ward for too long. 6 long hours later they figuare that I can't be put on anything that would help and all I need is warm compresses. Joyness. Stuart came back and picked me up. So I have no IV or Zofran and Iam back to being in bed. OHhh and this morning puss starting to come out of the sight. Thanks for the infection, dirtest place in the world. Lets hope it doesn't go to my shunt. I swear that this is just getting complicated for the heck of it. Anyone want to pay that bill?

July update

We went on a family trip to Idaho and Ty did so great on the plane. Stuart's rents and sister and brother went with us. We came home and I was immediately put on IV and Zofran pump. To date I am 20 weeks! Can't believe that I am half way there or 12 weeks away from a little one. For odd reasons we have been written off by Stuart's family after the trip. Long story short, I am too opinionated for my own good. I have always been the 'devil' just this time Stuart stood up for me. That was a great thing for our relationship as all these trials have brought us so much closer. We still don't know whether it is a boy or girl or both. Hopefully, we will find out soon.
Ty is soooo big. He his saying so many words and phrases. We are extremely blessed for his development. He is soooo kewt!
WE are finally feeling excitement for the adventures to come. I think that personally, I will always defy the odds. Feel free to stop by. I am at home.

IT"S A GIRL?

ya so you are as confused as us. today they said that it is a girl. ok well see what they say in another 4 weeks. I start Home health soon to start the IV and continue bed rest. I have lost 15 lbs. this sucks. jst got back form idaho. everything is crazy.

it's a boy!

#2 is kickin my butt. Went to the ER and got 3000 ml of fluid bc i am not keeping anything in. Ty broke his nose tripping over the dogs and Stuart is working nights and not sleeping during the day. I have been trying to find things to do outside the home but Ty got sick today and all he wanted was home. This has been the craziest week. IT started with Memorial Day and Stuart's family in town. Then Nightshift began. Last weekend we went down to Yuma for Kelley(his sister's graduation) drama drama drama. Between speeches in Spanish and Chinese only and almost getting beat up in the bathroom by a cholo bc mi gringa, I am not missing it. IT was fun to see familia. This weekend we might be going back down as Stuart's bro is in town b4 getting shipped back to Iraq. He is in the AirForce. Goooo. Everything would be easier if food would just stay down.

today

today was hard. I had an appointment for our first ultrasound. everything is fine with the baby. don't get nervous. however, the bills are just sermounting. Mayo is getting denied, from all the expermental tests on my tumor and we are just surrounded by bills. I have been able to negotiate through and advoid collections thus far but the end is near. But finally, stuart felt happy when he saw the baby on the ultrasound. so as i manage finances and not tell him a thing, he is coming around. there are risks and soon i will be back at the high risk doctor and they will mandate bed rest. With a 2 year old i doubt i'll follow orders. i am happy and calm this time and it is the best feeling! so the due date is December 15 but we probibly will be delievering in Oct just as Ty came at 32 weeks because i start to have brain damage. it sounds worse than it is. we are so excited for the new arrival!!!

defying

yes yes, i started showing way earily this time and while we were going to keep it secret for a little while to adjust to it. i am preggers. just barely 9 weeks. not excited just more nervous and stressed grateful and blessed.